un: fairchild | text

[creatio]

( Clary can't sleep. That isn't new, but thanks to the steady application of an Endurance rune she doesn't quite look like the walking dead yet. In fact, her stele turning up has been a godsend. Nourishment to stop her having to eat the weird replicated food, Stealth so that she can wander the halls at all hours, and Soundless so that no one hears her scream if she finally gets a few hours sleep before the nightmares come. But runes can't really help her state of mind, and there's only so much she can do to stop herself going crazy.

Which is what drives her to the network in the middle of the night, thoughts going round in vicious circles. )

if you could wish for one thing in the whole wide world, what would it be?

( Grief isn't new, not to Clary. Each person that gets taken from her is another chip in her heart. But she's used to doing something. With Simon, she'd forced the others to bury him so that he could come back. With Jocelyn, she'd killed the demon who took her. With Jace, there should have been a wish.

If whoever brought her here had waited only two more minutes. She was so close. But now she's here. And he's dead. And in the dark of artificial night she can't put on her cheery smile anymore. )

What if you knew that it was the only one, in the history of all wishes, and that using it would mean it was gone and no matter who might need it down the line it's been used up, would you still take it?

( Jace will be long dead by the time she manages to get home. If she manages. But she spilt blood, Raziel owes her. There's still a chance. )

Comments

[creatio]

i had to watch him die.

( It's easier to be blunt. Elaboration or explaination will only hurt her more in the end. )

and there was nothing i could do. i couldn't save him. but the wish could. i would have used it, if i hadn't woken up on the station.
i won't even be there for the funeral.
i guess i'm not dealing with it all that well.

[mutants]

[ there's the conversational money shot. fairchild is now one of the few people on her wavelength, as far as Lorna's concerned ]

If it was the other way around, would he use it to bring you back? [ There's not really a wrong answer. She's just trying to get an idea of the group dynamic OP was a part of, see if the rest of them are still idealists. ]

[creatio]

i think so.

he's been through so much for me when he could have walked away. he's defied his family, been tortured and hurt, been outcast for me.

even if he wouldn't, i'd still bring him back. i love him. and i'm tired of people dying because of me.

[mutants]

War is bullshit. [ couldn't be anything else, Lorna figures, not once torture's part of the equation thinks the lady who is most often on the torturer side ]
But looks like death is too, to this place. He might show up one day, funeral or not.

i am so sorry this is so laye.

[creatio]

yeah. it's never the people who caused it that end up losing either.

( Except for Valentine when she stabbed him. )

you think?
i hadn't --. maybe it's best not to think about it. i might go crazier than i already am if i put too much hope in it.