[text/video] un: @skull

[ryuji]

[A few days after gravity is restored to the station, Ryuji returns to the mess hall from Haru's garden to find a small robot flipped upside down, panicking through a series of morse beeps and boops, which- okay, that's kind of cool, and quickly figures out that the paneling and suction entrances of the little guy means it's probably meant for filtration and cleaning.

Looks pretty study, looks... waterproof, maybe? He lends a hand to get him right side up and it starts slowly moving forward. Ryuji takes out his communicator and immediately films this as it happens, because, why not?

He posts two videos on the network- the roomba moving down the hall and one, a few hours later in the fitness center as it crawls from the edge, and dives right in.]

Oh shit! Are you supposed to do that?

Whoa, whoa- I don't know how to fix you if you--- WHOA, COOL.




Hey, sup?

Just lettin you guys know the pool looks crystal clear now. All thanks to this little dude.

I figure I should give 'em a name but uh

Everything that comes to mind is kinda lame

Anyway, I think it's good? Anyone wanna give it the first try?

[Complete with file0033.png - a picture of crystal clear water.]

Comments

[ryuji]

Was that supposed to be a pun?

[He's fixated.]

[artisticliberty]

Of course it was. Did you not see how I italicized the 'bot' in Botticelli? If we are going to name our pets artistically, we should put some thought into it.

[he's of course referring to Lisa]

[ryuji]

Wait what?

IT'S NOT A PET, IT'S A ROBOT. WITH FEELINGS. GEEZ.

[artisticliberty]

[ryuji...pls]

Are you saying pets don't have feelings? And why are you so sure this robot has them?

[ryuji]

I dunno, it seemed so distressed when I found him that I assume it's basically got a whole lot of things going on that it needs someone to talk to. Also, it kinda just appeared out of nowhere when the pool was messed up for a month and it'd probably been all cooped up somewhere.

[artisticliberty]

[face it, ryuji: it's a pet robot]

You sound quite fond of it.

[ryuji]

Well yeah

He's just about the coolest little dude out there?

I mean, who wouldn't love him

[artisticliberty]

Have you considered the idea that you may be projecting onto it?

[ryuji]

No, I don't have a projector??

[artisticliberty]

It means you're imagining your robot friend to have feelings you don't know it has. Have you been feeling lonely?

[ryuji]

[What the fuck. Don't do this, Yusuke???]

I'm doin' the best I can, man.

[artisticliberty]

Is that meant to be a yes or a no?

[ryuji]

It's a nothing

Like

A non-answer

[artisticliberty]

Being evasive doesn't suit you. Send me your location.

[ryuji]

Man... this ain't what I had in mind today at all

But I'm at the pool

Really, dude, I'm cool

You don't gotta rush over or anything

I'm just chilling with Simba-chan

[artisticliberty]

[I HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR YUSUKE TO BE AT YOUR SIDE IN TEN MINUTES]

There you are.

[totally gonna examine this robot friend, tho]

Intriguing...

[ryuji]

[God, no, why? We don't have to talk about our feelings, Yusuke, he's doing great.

So... right. Simba.]

Sup.

[Casual, sitting on a chair by the pool (sorry, Yusuke, he's stripped down to his boxer briefs since he went in the pool to take pics and doesn't have a bathing suit), legs stretched out and into the water. It always felt good on his bad leg to do stuff like this.]

Does he fit your aesthetic?

[artisticliberty]

[why would you think yusuke would choose to ignore expressing and observing human emotional vulnerability]

He is somehow charming... you said you named it--him--Simba?

[ryuji]

[Excellent point, but Ryuji isn't that intuitive about these things.]

Yeah. Simba-chan. You know, like... the Lion King. Hakuna Matata, all that stuff.

[He looks into the water, watching Simba go.

Such a hard little worker.]

[artisticliberty]

Oh, I remember that movie. A classic of the Disney Renaissance era in the early 90s.

[watching the pool roomba go]

What made you choose that?

[ryuji]

[He talks about it almost scientifically, and Ryuji raises an eyebrow. Disney Renaissance?]

I wonder if I can still sing all the words to "I Just Can't Wait to be King"

[Probably, those sort of memories are almost ingrained from childhood.

If there was some deeper, universal meaning here, maybe it was because the song was about a son rising up to the challenges of becoming king despite wanting to have a simple life. Or maybe it was because Mufasa was actually a good father, unlike his own. Maybe. But the truth of the matter is-]

Dave made the joke like... forever ago. "What do you get if you cross a cat and a roomba?" "A Simba"

So it kinda stuck when we found an actual Roomba, y'know?

[artisticliberty]

I see.

[does he??]

Well, he's doing an excellent job cleaning the pool. Are you going to use it?

[ryuji]

[Looking up at Yusuke, he smirks, half thinking that he should pull the other in- but he knows that it wouldn't be taken very well.]

Hm? Hah! Well... I already went in. It feels great. And the best part about it? No green slime threatening to cause you to mutate an extra arm or two.

[Although he had been in the pool before when it was dirty... and didn't grow any extra limbs.]

Why. You wanna go in~?

[artisticliberty]

Mutate? I would have liked to have seen that.

[he would have drawn the heck out of his friends turning into mutants]

I might as well, since I am here. Though I don't possess a bathing suit at the moment...

[yusuke 'hmmm's quietly, considering his options. as long as there's no reason to worry about getting a sunburn, there's no reason to cover up, either]

[ryuji]

Dude.

[Ryuji, sitting at the pool's edge, naked except for his underwear, just kind of... Vanna White swipes down his body to show himself off.]

Just go in like this. It ain't that bad. You just gotta wait for your jimmies to dry off before puttin' the jumpsuit back on. Which is kinda a pain, but, whatever. We got tons of time just... floating in space waiting for the next horribly dumb effin' thing to happen.