un: aphrodite ;; text ;; 001 <- "first post"

[wingstosee]

so i'm not really sure how this works?
it doesn't look like anyone else has posted yet.
but uhhhh no time like the present, right?
so
my... bracelet? watch?
i guess it's kind of a smartwatch.
anyway it said something new just now.

"we made it work. attempt number six was successful. it worked, everyone!"
"wait, there's a problem, we're not where we..."

does this sound familiar to anyone?
there might have been more but i was in the cafeteria
or well. am, i guess

also, first post?
i think you're supposed to say that.

wow i have no idea where to end this.
i hope you're all having a good day?
even with the kidnapping and everything.
okay bye

wait jk jk
jupiter, if you see this
let me know, okay?
this is venus. though i guess that's pretty obvious.
i'm really worried :(
that was probably obvious too

okay bye for real this time?
maybe??
yeah.

Comments

un: snakeeyes

[eightsandaces]

Interesting. I received the same message.

un: aphrodite

[wingstosee]

oh! that's good to know
this guy i'm sitting with says it's probably not meant for us
and i mean. i guess that makes sense?
but if we're all getting it that also seems less likely.

was it just now for you?
like a few minutes ago

un: noir

[mapsio]

Oh how strange, I don't think I received that kind of message?
Maybe someone sent you something by mistake?

[She's going to be checking her own watch.]

un: aphrodite

[wingstosee]

maybe?
i don't know.
i mean, if three people got it, that seems pretty likely...

did you get it just now?

[mapsio]

I'm looking through my watch currently.
I don't see the message in mine.
Hmmm... maybe they haven't gotten it to the right person yet.

[Concern.]

[wingstosee]

hmmmmm.

ugh.
yeah, i don't really know.
i'm not even sure it was meant to be sent out at all.
or, well
it had to have been, right???
just maybe not for us.
why else would only a few of us get it

[mapsio]

With content like that...
Hmm.
If I had to say something like that, I wouldn't want it to be sent out.
So clearly it must be some sort of accident, or someone trying to scare people.

[As if some of them here aren't already scared enough, right?]

I wonder if there was more to the message myself.

[wingstosee]

oh! yeah, that has to be it.
trying to hear it was like...
okay
you know when you're tuning a radio, trying to find the right station?
and sometimes you get just close enough to hear something, but then it's gone?
this was kind of like that

[ that was actually a workable analogy, venus. we're all very impressed. ]

[mapsio]

Maybe someone else here got another part to the message? It's just a thought!

[It was a good analogy, Haru got it in one.]

If it does turn out to be a prank, shame on that person.

un: gallowsCalibrator

[iustitia]

OH MY GOD
1 TH1NK TH1S POST H4D MOR3 3ND1NGS TH4N TH3 MOV13 4D4PT4T1ON OF TROLL LORD OF TH3 R1NGS

un: aphrodite

[wingstosee]

[ wow, that, uh. that sure is something. she's pretty sure she talked to someone like this in middle school once. ]

is that...
um. maybe an obvious question here
is that lord of the rings but with trolls?

[iustitia]

NO
1T'S 4CTU4LLY D3L1B3R4T3LY M1SN4M3D 4S 4 JOK3 ON TH3 4UD13NC3
1T H4S NO TROLLS WH4TSO3V3R
4ND 1S 1N F4CT 4 FOUR HUNDR3D P4G3 MONOGR4PH ON TH3 M4T1NG H4B1TS OF 4N 3ND4NG3R3D SLUG SP3C13S FOUND ON 4 PL4N3T COLON1Z3D BY TH3 4LT3RN14N 3MP1R3 SW33PS 4GO FOR 1TS 4BUND4NT 4VOC4DO H4RV3STS
TH3 3MPR3SS W4NT3D TO 3XP4ND H3R S4NDW1CH CH41N 4ND 4PP34L TO TH3 COOL YOUNGST3RS 4ND UNFORTUNT4T3LY TH3 POOR SLUGS W3R3 C4UGHT 1N TH3 CROSSF1R3

Y3S 1T'S LORD OF TH3 R1NGS BUT W1TH TROLLS!!!
1T'S PROB4BLY MOR3 CORR3CT TO S4Y TH4T YOUR V3RS1ON 1S TROLL LORD OF TH3 R1NGS BUT W1TH HUM4NS S1NC3 OUR V3RS1ON C4M3 F1RST
BUT TH4T L34DS 1NTO 4 LONG 4ND STUP1D CONV3RS4T1ON TH4T FR4NKLY 1 DON'T KNOW 1F 31TH3R OF US 4R3 UP FOR R1GHT NOW
G1V3N TH3 SP4C3 K1DN4PP1NG 4ND 3V3RYTH1NG

GOOD JOB CL41M1NG TH3 F1RST POST BY TH3 W4Y
1T'S 1MPORT4NT TO ST4K3 YOUR CL41M 34RLY 4ND L3T 3V3RYON3 KNOW WHO'S BOSS 1N TH3S3 K1NDS OF S1TU4T1ONS
WH4T D1D TH3 P3RSON SP34K1NG SOUND L1K3?
1 H4V3N'T H34RD 4NYTH1NG L1K3 1T ON MY W4TCH

[wingstosee]

i mean, the humans aren't really that relevant in our lord of the rings
so it'd be more...
"troll lord of the rings but with hobbits," i think?
hahaha.

and um
it was a woman's voice?
at least i think it was.
she sounded... kind of alarmed
or at least that's what it sounded like at the time

also thanks.
i think.

[iustitia]

OH MY GOD Y3S TH3Y 4R3???
TROLL 4R4GORN'S D1STR4CT1ON 4T TH3 BL4CK G4T3S 1S 1NT3GR4L TO M4K1NG SUR3 TROLL FRODO 4ND TROLL S4M R34CH TH3 VOLC4NO
4ND TROLL BOROM1R'S D34TH H4S CONS3QU3NC3S TH4T 4FF3CT 4 TON OF CH4R4CT3RS TH3 FURTH3R 1N TH3 BOOK YOU G3T

4NYW4Y 1T'S NOT 4BOUT R3L3V4NC3
HOBB1TS C4N'T 4CT 1N 4NY MOV13 4D4PT4T1ON, TROLL OR OTH3RW1S3
TH3Y DON'T 3X1ST!!
4ND 1F TH3Y DO 1 GU3SS 1 JUST D1DN'T P4Y 3NOUGH 4TT3NT1ON DUR1NG SCHOOLF33D1NG

DOUBL3 4NYW4Y!!!!!!!
1 WOND3R WH4T TH3Y W3R3 TRY1NG... >:?
1T SOUNDS L1K3 TH3Y W3R3 4TT3MPT1NG TO GO SOM3WH3R3 4ND 1T D1DN'T WORK OUT, BUT WHO KNOWS?
UGH, 1 W1SH TH3R3 W4S MOR3 TO GO ON 4ROUND H3R3

[wingstosee]

if troll boromir is like human boromir then i think he's kind of forgettable???
like.
i'd say sorry but i don't really want to lie.

yeah, that sounds about right?
it doesn't really explain why only a few people have gotten that message.
me and one other person so far, i think.

maybe we got a dead person's smartwatch?
ugh.
that's not great to think about.

[iustitia]

WH4T? NO W4Y!!!
TROLL S34N B34N 1S 4 V3RY 4TTR4CT1V3 M4N
H3 1S NOT 4T 4LL FORG3TT4BL3 3V3N 1F H3 1S UN1QU3LY T4L3NT3D 4T DY1NG
1 F33L S1NC3R3LY SORRY FOR 34RTH 1F YOUR HUM4N BOROM1R 4CTOR 1S GROSS

OH
3W???
M4YB3 YOU SHOULD W4SH TH4T OFF B3FOR3 YOU TOUCH 1T 4NY MOR3

[wingstosee]

oh my god.
oh my god?

i want you to guess who the human actor for troll boromir is.

[iustitia]

NO
NO W4Y
YOU'R3 K1DD1NG M3, R1GHT?
T3LL M3 YOU'R3 NOT 4BOUT TO S4Y HUM4N S34N B34N

[eightsandaces]

This guy with you is an expert on wristwatch recordings, is he?

[wingstosee]

oh!
that makes so much sense!
i mean, if i was only able to tune it for part of it, then maybe...

wait. no
urghhh. these aren't really radio wave, i don't think?
it's probably like, actually recorded
which means that quality's going to be the same for anyone who listens.

at least, i think?
i'm not really any good with cell phones and stuff.

[wingstosee]

it is
100%
completely and unmistakably
human sean bean.

oh my god.
i am so sorry.
but also i feel like i've just unlocked some secret of the universe, or something?
we have to try other actors. please.

[wingstosee]

well, probably not?
but he probably knows more than me about them.
i'm not really any good with that sort of thing. or any thing.
hahaha.

i mean, if it were a radio, maybe?
but... it's not.
at least, it's not one i could really do anything about.

[iustitia]

HOLY SH1T
HOLY SH1T???
TH1S 1S B1G
OK4Y
UH
T3LL M3 WHO PL4YS TROLL D3CK4RD 1N TH4T FUTUR1ST1C NO1R MOV13 4BOUT 4NDRO1DS

un: crow

[uragiru]

That's a curious message...
I suspect it has something to do with the fact that this station seems to have been occupied by someone before us.
That recording might be from a device similar to a CVR.

[mapsio]

A cellphone wouldn't be, no.
At least I am pretty sure it wouldn't be?
Someone would have needed to record that message with a cellphone/one of our smartwatches to send it out....

Hmmm, there are too many possibilities here.