text | un: gallowsCalibrator

[iustitia]

4LR1GHT, SO H3R3'S TH3 S1TCH
4 WH1L3 B4CK, 1 FOUND TH1S US3R M4NU4L 1N MY ROOM
1T'S FOR TH3 FOOD R3PL1C4TORS, 4ND 1T'S COMPL1C4T3D 4S SH1T!
1 TR13D TO G3T TH3M OP3N 34RL13R 4ND TRY TO F1GUR3 OUT WH4T'S GO1NG ON W1TH TH3M 4ND 4 LOT OF GOOD P3OPL3 C4M3 TO H3LP (TH4NK YOU BY TH3 W4Y!!!! >:D)
4ND W3 K1ND4 GOT ON3 F1X3D!
BUT TH3N TH3 GR4V1TY STUFF H4PP3N3D
SO

TH1S TOOK FOR3V3R B3C4US3 4S F4R 4S 1 C4N T3LL, TH3R3 1SN'T 4 FUCK1NG SC4NN3R 4NYWH3R3 1 C4N F1ND!!!
(PL34S3 DON'T CORR3CT M3 1F TH3R3 1S ON3)
(TH3N 1'LL JUST F33L 4S DUMB 4S 4 P1L3 OF ROCKS B1K3 HORNS)
BUT 4NYW4Y
1 M4D3 4 COPY OF TH3 WHOL3 TH1NG SO NOW SOM3ON3 W4Y MOR3 3XP3R13NC3D W1TH TH1S JUNK C4N T4K3 4 LOOK 4T 1T
B3C4US3 1 H4V3 NOOOO 1D34 WH4T 1'M DO1NG
H3R3 YOU GO! 1T 1S OUT OF MY H4NDS NOW!! 1T'S YOUR COLL3CT1V3 PROBL3M NOW!!!

B1G_BOOK_OF_STUFF_1_DONT_UND3RST4ND.zip

4NYW4Y
1 HOP3 1T'S NOT TOO D3PR3SS1NG TO S4Y TH4T 1T LOOKS L1K3 W3 4R3 GO1NG TO B3 ON TH1S ST4T1ON FOR 4 GOOD, LONG T1M3
TH4T'S JUST TH3 F4CTS!
TH3R3'S JUST NOT 4 WHOL3 LOT OF STUFF TO DO 4ROUND H3R3 FOR FUN, UNL3SS YOU L1K3 WORK1NG OUT OR LOOK1NG 4T SP4C3 OR G3TT1NG W4ST3D 1 GU3SS
WOULD 4NYON3 B3 1NT3R3ST3D 1N G3TT1NG TOG3TH3R FOR 4 GOOD OLD F4SH1ON3D D1C3 PL4T34U ROL3PL4Y1NG G4M3 >:?
1'M PR3TTY GOOD 4T RUNN1NG S3SS1ONS, 1F 1 DO S4Y SO MYS3LF >;]
1 DON'T H4V3 4NY OF MY SOURC3 BOOKS H3R3 BUT TH4T DO3SN'T H4V3 TO B3 4 B4D TH1NG
H34VY NUMB3R CRUNCH1NG 4ND ST4TS C4N G3T 1N TH3 W4Y OF WH4T M4K3S TH3S3 G4M3S FUN
4ND 1F YOU'R3 4 N3WCOM3R YOU DON'T H4V3 TO WORRY 4BOUT 4LL TH4T STUFF 4ND C4N D1V3 1NTO TH3 GOOD B1TS

L3T M3 KNOW 1F YOU TH1NK TH1S 1S SOM3TH1NG YOU'D L1K3 TO DO! >:D

Comments

@skull

[ryuji]

[He thinks he's read this right?]

Mad ups to the fact that you even got anywhere with those monstrosities to begin with

There's hope for decent shit to eat yet

But man... the prospect of bein on this place for a while kinda sucks

What's a dice plateau roleplaying game

Is that like a video game?

[iustitia]

TH3 1D34 OF B31NG H3R3 FOR 4 WH1L3 BLOWS CHUNKS!
BUT 1T'S B3TT3R TO 4CC3PT 1T 4ND S3TTL3 1N FOR TH3 LONG H4UL 1NST34D OF 3XP3CT1NG SOM3TH1NG TH4T M1GHT NOT H4PP3N
YOU GOTT4 PR3P4R3 M3NT4LLY FOR TH1S K1ND OF STUFF, B3C4US3 1T C4N R34LLY T4K3 4 TOLL

1F 1 M34NT 4 V1D3O G4M3, 1 WOULD H4V3 S41D 4 V1D3O G4M3!
D1C3 PL4T34U G4M3S 4R3 WH3N YOU G4TH3R 4ROUND 1N P3RSON W1TH 4 BUNCH OF FR13NDS TO PL4Y PR3T3NDY FUNT1M3S W1TH 34CH OTH3R
SOM3T1M3S YOU ROLL D1C3 TO F1GUR3 OUT WH4T H4PP3NS
TH3 K1ND 1 L1K3 TO PL4Y 1NVOLV3S M4K1NG CH4R4CT3RS 4ND GO1NG 1NTO DUNG3ONS TO F1GHT MONST3RS

[ryuji]

Speakin from experience?

Yeah but like... how do go in between preparing for this to be a while and the really depressin' thought that we're NOT gonna get off of here, ever? I guess you just gotta have hope, or something? Maybe better food'll help.

[This just makes him miss his mom even more.]

Oh

So... a video game but in your head! Got it.

Sounds kinda fun?

[iustitia]

4 L1TTL3, Y34H
1 SP3NT THR33 HUM4N 34RTH Y34RS ON 4 SP4C3 TR1P OF MY OWN 4 WH1L3 B4CK
TH4T ON3 W4S D1FF3R3NT B3C4US3 TH3R3 W4S 4 D3F1N1T3 3ND GO4L, UNL1K3 H3R3

1T'S NOT SOM3TH1NG 1 C4N R34LLY 4NSW3R S1NC3 D1FF3R3NT TH1NGS WORK FOR D1FF3R3NT P3OPL3 1N D1FF3R3NT C1RCUMST4NC3S
BUT M4K1NG TH3 S1TU4T1ON YOU'R3 CURR3NTLY 1N B3TT3R C4N H3LP 4 LOT
G3TT1NG B3TT3R FOOD
H4NG1NG OUT W1TH GOOD P3OPL3 YOU C4N T4LK TO 4ND TRUST
H4V1NG 4 GO4L TO WORK TOW4RDS, L1K3 UNLOCK1NG MOR3 OF TH1S PL4C3
STUFF L1K3 TH4T!
1T'S V3RY 34SY FOR THOUGHTS TO SP1R4L OUT OF CONTROL
YOU 4LW4YS H4V3 TO B3 M1NDFUL OF YOUR OWN M1ND >:]

4ND Y34H, THOS3 G4M3S C4N B3 PR3TTY FUN!
1 US3D TO PL4Y 4 LOT OF TH3M WH3N 1 W4S YOUNG3R BUT 1 QU1T TH3 S3R1OUS STUFF FOR 4 WH1L3
1 3V3N TR13D TO RUN 4 C4MP41GN ON TH4T TR1P 1 M3NT1ON3D 34RL13R BUT NOBODY W4NT3D TO PL4Y 4ND 1T W4S JUST K1ND OF 4 M3SS >:[

[ryuji]

[Light bulb moment:

> 3 earth years
> "You'd definitely know it if you met her"

Ohhhhhh.]

Terezi, right? You and Dave are friends?

Wow that's some really good advice. I'll definitely take it to heart. Honestly, everything kinda sucks balls here but at least there are some good people here to hang with. That's made it at least... a million percent better.

[She's right. Simba fixing the pool was actually a pretty big highlight for the last month. It's little things. He wants other people, or at the very least the ones he cares about, to be comfortable and have ways of not going absolutely bonkers with nothing to do.

So maybe nerding about in some pen and paper adventures isn't bad either. In this train of thought, he smiles at his smart watch. Maybe she's trying to do the same thing. Or he's reading too much into it and just wants something to do that isn't taking apart and putting together a protein goo fabricator.]

You're not tryin to do the serious stuff here right I mean... I gotta imagine everyone on board are a bunch of noobs at what you're tryin' to pull off

Anyway, if you got extra room sign me up? I'm probably gonna suck at it though

[iustitia]

Y3P, TH4T'S M3!
YOU KNOW D4V3?
1 HOP3 H3'S NOT G1V1NG YOU TOO MUCH TROUBL3 >;]

4ND 3V3N 1F 1 W4NT3D TO DO TH3 S3R1OUS STUFF, 1 C4N'T
1 DON'T H4V3 4NY OF MY SOURC3 BOOKS 4ND TH3R3 4R3 JUST TOO M4NY RUL3S FOR ON3 P3RSON TO R3M3MB3R!
4ND 1 KNOW 1T'S R34LLY 1NT1M1D4T1NG FOR N3W P3OPL3 TO G3T 1NTO 1F TH3Y H4V3 TO WORRY 4BOUT 4LL TH3 NUMB3RS
BUT W3'R3 GO1NG TO PL4Y W1THOUT 4ND 34S3 YOU 1NTO 1T
SO DON'T WORRY 4BOUT SUCK1NG!
(TOO MUCH >:P)

[ryuji]

Nah, he's pretty alright

Oh god there are numbers why are there numbers

But ok

Count me in what do I gotta do?

[iustitia]

TH4T W4S JUST 4 JOK3
D4V3 1S 4 V3RY GOOD FR13ND OF M1N3
4ND TH4T'S WHY 1 L1K3 TO G1V3 H1M SH1T! >:]

NUMB3RS H3LP YOU F1GUR3 OUT WH4T YOU C4N DO
L1K3
4R3 YOU STRONG 3NOUGH TO L1FT TH1S BOULD3R?
P3RC3PT1V3 3NOUGH TO NOT1C3 TH4T TR4P?
BUT TH3Y 4R3 NOT N3C3SS4RY
4LL YOU N33D TO DO 1S....................
[DRUMROLL PL34S3...............]

CR34T3 4 CH4R4CT3R!
YOU M4K3 UP 4 P3RSON TO PL4Y 4ND TH3N N4RR4T3 WH4T TH3Y'R3 DO1NG!
4ND YOU C4N 1NT3R4CT W1TH 3V3RYON3 3LS3 WHO'S PL4Y1NG 4ND GO ON 4DV3NTUR3S 4ND STUFF

[ryuji]

Oh. Cool! I like to give him shit too. It's like... super damn easy.

Not really sure on the whole numbers thing still but... you'll help, right? In case I mess everything up royally

Committing royal assassination on this RPG

[She can't hear him, but he does drumroll. In near perfect beat, too.]

Ok. So is it like that tank, healer, dps holy trinity kinda thing? I wanna play someone strong that can not only lift boulders but break 'em too

[iustitia]

OF COURS3 1'D H3LP!
1'M NOT GO1NG TO JUST THROW SOM3BODY 1NTO TH3 D33P 3ND W1THOUT 4NY W4RN1NG
1 4M TOLD TH4T TH1S 1S WH4T TH3 HUM4NS C4LL
"4 D1CK MOV3"

HMMMM, Y3S BUT NOT QU1T3, BUT TH4T'S 4N 34SY W4Y OF TH1NK1NG 4BOUT 1T
B1G B33FY P3RSON UP FRONT, P3OPL3 TH4T C4N DO 4 LOT OF D4M4G3, OTH3RS TH4T C4N BUFF 4ND CONTROL TH3 B4TTL3F13LD...
4ND YOU H4V3 P3OPL3 WHO 4R3 GOOD 4T NON-COMB4T STUFF, L1K3 T4LK1NG OR F1ND1NG TR4PS

BUT 1F YOU W4NN4 JUST H1T 4 GUY
4 F1GHT3R 1S 4 GOOD CL4SS1C?
OR 4 B4RB4R14N!
TH3Y G3T R34L M4D 4ND BUST 3V3RYTH1NG UP

[ryuji]

Lingo checks out dude

Dick moves are dickish

Oh man... that sounds off the chain!

Uh

Yeah, let's go with the angry guy motif. I gotta think of a name. Shit, this is always the hard part. Those type of games that you play where you gotta spend at least an hour in character creation are always the toughest. By the time you pick out somethin' you like you're practically like

Ehhhh I guess I gotta play now. But I also just wanna see what this dude looks like bald with a heart shaped tattoo on his face and tall as hell.

[iustitia]

[ryuji]

Whoa

I think I'm in love

His name is Lug

And he will protect everyone

[iustitia]

H3 S33MS L1K3 4 GOOD GUY
1 WOULD TRUST H1M W1TH MY L1F3 4ND HOUS3 K3YS

[ryuji]

Oh shit you know you trust someone when you'd let them into your house when you're not home

Not that Lug would know what to do once he's in there, I mean, if they're friends, he'd probably just sit on the couch really awkwardly bc he wouldn't wanna break anything around him

Even though he's like practically made to break shit

[iustitia]

H3H3H3
1 B3T H3 ST4NDS 1N TH3 CORN3R 4T P4RT13S W1TH 4 B33R 4ND W4TCH3S H1S FR13NDS H4V3 FUN
4ND TH3N 4FT3RW4RDS H3'S TH3 ON3 3V3RYON3 TRUSTS TO DR1V3 TH3M HOM3 B3C4US3 H3'S R3SPONS1BL3
BUT 1F YOU M3SS W1TH H1S FR1N3DS H3 BR34KS 1NTO YOUR HOUS3 4T 2 4M TO L34V3 4 HORS3 H34D 1N YOUR B3D

[ryuji]

Well yeah cuz he needs to make sure that they get home safely and stuff and you don't do that if you're shatfaced three ways to hell and back

He's like

Putting the DD in D&D

I'm so ready for this mess

Minus the horse heads IDK that seems little messed?

[iustitia]

D3S1GN4T3D DR1V3RS 4ND DR4GONS
***3L3V3NTH 3D1T1ON***
P3RC3PT1ON CH3CK TO S33 1F 1T'S OK4Y FOR YOUR FR13ND TO H4V3 4NOTH3R B33R OR 1F YOU N33D TO C4LL TH1NGS OFF 34RLY
ROLL STR3NGTH FOR HOW LONG YOU C4N K3G ST4ND

[ryuji]

He can probably keg stand for like... THE ENTIRE GODDAMN THING. He's like that greek dude who held the world up on his shoulders only the world is upside down and it's made of beer and he's downing that shit dry until it ain't got a lick of the shit left in it

But he won't since he's a master and everyone knows a true master of things only ever has to show their hand once and only at the most critical moment

It's pretty lit